On Relationships

byVedic Sanatan Hinduism -

Our experience of connections passes through three distinct phases in the course of a continuance. The first phase is when we start erecting connections. occasionally we do it purposely, but more frequently our connections get erected by a force beyond our control. When we're youthful, we like to explore, we want to know further people, we want to broaden our horizon. A kind of network of musketeers is formed, in addition to the family network that we inherit. further people come a part of our circle when we move into a new neighborhood or when we enter the pool and forge new connections. recently, numerous use social media to make a virtual network of “ musketeers ” in order to compound their being circle( or to make up for the lack of any). The alternate phase, which generally occurs when we're in our 20s and 30s, is when we start assessing and assessing our connections. It does n’t take long to realize how pervious the network is and how dynamic its composition. Some nonage connections come distant or are lost, other connections that we pick up remain in the network for varying ages and also vanish, but a many endure. We come more apprehensive of what we're looking for in our connections. When we find what we're looking for, it’s bliss; when we do n’t, we're disappointed, occasionally agonized. The third phase begins when we're aged and( hopefully) more mature and thoughtful. This is the phase of pruning, questioning and reflecting. With lesser tone- knowledge we know which connections need to be fostered and which need to terminate. We also question the part and extent of some connections and agonize over them. We begin to reflect over what our connections have meant to us and how they've converted us. We discover that a mature relationship isn't hampered by separation created by distance or indeed by death. The person we relate to is no longer only outdoors, but in some strange kind of way has come an inner, subtler, thick presence. That's how we remain connected with indeed those who are no longer with us. It isn't frequently honored that spiritual life is primarily a life devoted to discovering the relationship between oneself and God. Swami Vivekananda defined religion as “ the eternal relation between the eternal soul and the eternal God ”( CW 3. 4). Who am I really? Who's God? How are God and me related? The mystery of life is answered when answers to these questions are set up. In the early stages, our connections in the world appear more real, more stable, more reliable than our relationship with God, who's someone we've noway seen, someone who's simply an idea in the head, or stopgap in the heart, or a belief in the mind. An idea of God, or stopgap or belief related to God, is important nonetheless. Anything associated with God is pigmented with God’s power. Deep faith( śraddhā) can help us persist in the hunt for God. When our spiritual practice is powered by chastity, tolerance and perseverance, the reality of God gradationally begins to take shape in the heart. It’s nearly like seeing someone in a thick fog. We do n’t know who it's we're seeing, but we've no doubt that we're seeing someone. In contemplation we're suitable to feel the presence of God but not relatively see God. nonetheless, a kind of relationship is forged with this unseen but deeply felt godly presence. This is a advance in spiritual life. We reach the first concrete goalpost when we know that God truly exists. This isn't an intellectual conviction. This isn't simply a feeling. This is the unshakeable mindfulness that comes without riding on generalities and ideas. God the idea, the stopgap, the belief, disappears. God is now someone real, not simply someone propped up by faith. passing in this way the actuality of God is a precursor to knowing God more nearly, further privately( see Kaṭha Upaniṣad,2.3.13). God isn't yet visible enough to make a near relationship possible or easy. But we know for certain we ’ll meet God when the fog disappears. The only thing separating us from God is this mysterious fog. We soon realize that the fog isn't outdoors. It wo n’t evaporate on its own. The fog is within us and we've to drive it down with our own sweats. No bone differently can or will do this for us. The further we delay our sweats, the thick the fog gets. This consummation infuses new energy and lesser urgency in our spiritual practice. After all, time is limited and, if the fog does n’t dissipate before death, we might have to come again to continue the struggle. Having come this far, it would be foolish to throw in the kerchief. It’s like dropping off in the last afar of a heroically run marathon. What keeps us on the path is deep faith in ourselves, in our schoolteacher( practitioner), and in God, who's frequently imaged in the heart in the form of a chosen ideal( iṣṭa- devatā). When the fog disappears completely — it will, if we persist with dogged determination — we stand in the presence of God. At that vital moment, relationship is the last thing on our minds. In fact, at that moment, there's no mind, hence no studies. We're speechless. Time stops.( perhaps it noway was, to begin with.) There's just reposing in the light of God — in the light who's God. Those who “ come back ” from that experience have described their understanding of God in manifold ways. No matter how the relationship with God is described, the experience generally ends up with seeing God in everything, as everything and, contemporaneously, beyond everything. Odd, but true. We're reminded of the immanence of God described in the 9th and the 10th chapters of the Gītā, and especially in these two verses( 9. 17- 18) पिताहमस्य जगतो माता धाता पितामह । वेद्यं पवित्रमोङ्कार ऋक् साम यजुरेव च ॥ गतिर्भर्ता प्रभु साक्षी निवास शरणं सुहृत् । प्रभव प्रलय स्थानं निधानं बीजमव्ययम् ॥ Pitāham asya jagato mātā dhātā pitāmahaḥ, vedyaṁ pavitram oṁkāra ṛk sāma yajur- eva ca. Gatir- bhartā prabhuḥ sākṣī nivāsaḥ śaraṇaṁ suhṛt, prabhavaḥ pralayaḥ sthānaṁ nidhānaṁ bījam avyayam. “ I'm the Father of this world the Mother, the Sustainer, the forefather, the Purifier, the one thing to be known, Aum, and also the Ṛk, Sāman and Yajus, the thing, the Supporter, the Lord, the Witness, the Abode, the Refuge, the Friend, the Origin, the Dissolution, the Substratum, the Storehouse, the Seed inflexible. ” Hence the following prayer( Prapanna Gītā, 23) त्वमेव माता च पिता त्वमेव त्वमेव बन्धुश्च सखा त्वमेव । त्वमेव विद्या द्रविणं त्वमेव त्वमेव सर्वं मम देवदेव ॥ Tvam eva mātā ca pitā tvam eva tvam eva bandhuś- ca sakhā tvam eva, Tvam eva vidyā draviṇaṁ tvam eva tvam eva sarvaṁ ma devadeva. “ O Supreme Lord — You're my mama , you're my father, You're my relative, you're my friend, You're my knowledge, you're my wealth, You're my all in all. ” Coming from a heart filled with sincerity and honesty, this important prayer focuses the mind completely on God. Everything additional disappears, all other connections retire into the background. The shining presence of God alone fills the heart. Soon enough, however, questions mayarise.However, father, relative, If God is my mama .Our connections are, of course, not false. Whatever meaning they add to our lives comes from the presence of God essential in them. The love we witness in our connections is the love ofGod.However, that's because God is present not only in them but also in the relationship, If our relationship with our parents has been fulfilling and perfecting. So with our connections with our preceptors, our musketeers, and indeed with the “ unanticipated guest ”( atithi), meaning whoever pops into our lives without previous notice. This really means nearly everyone we know, for how frequently have we entered a memo before someone becomes a part of our lives? God is present in everyone and in every relationship. The problem is that we aren't suitable to see this. That's why Vedic preceptors instructed their scholars to make trouble to see God in every relationship( Taittirīya Upaniṣad, 1. 11). When we succeed in doing so, there's harmony, peace, joy, and the relationship is a fulfilling experience. What does it mean to see God in every relationship? What exactly are we anticipated to do? The process is simple enough to describe but may need a lot of trouble to do it well. All we need to do is connect with everything and everyone in life through God and flash back this connection all the time. We can begin by seeing our connections with a fresh brace of eyes. Everyone we're related to either as a member of the family or as a friend or as whatever, is a gift that God has given us to help us grow and evolve. Some of God’s “ gifts ” may be puzzling. It may not be easy to see everyone as a gift, since some of them surely are people we find delicate to get on, some may be crazy, some indeed scary. numerous others, thankfully, may be a joy to be around. No matter how everyone around us is, there's a lot we can learn indeed from simply looking at them. From some we learn how we should live; from others, how we shouldn't live. Some educate us how to be, other educate us how not to be. All of these people are our preceptors and earn our love and respect. We can also, if we wish, learn to see every person we're related to as belonging to God, as someone God has entrusted in our care. When a friend goes on a holiday and requests us to take care of their canine or cat, we readily do so if we watch enough for our friend. For a sucker, God isn't only a friend but everything. It makes a big difference if we see the people in our lives as those kept in our care by God. We take care of them and we love them because we love God. Because they belong to God, God can take them down whenever God wants. All we can do is be thankful for the occasion to serve as long as it's possible. To serve them is to serve God. “ Whatever you did for one of the least of these sisters and sisters of mine, you did for me ”( Matthew, 25 40). The primary cause of connections that are unfulfilling, frustrating, disappointing, and heartbreaking is our failure in flashing back to see God in others and in our own hearts, our incapability to see everyone in our lives as God’s gift to us or as someone God has entrusted in our care. The struggle is to flash back — and noway forget — that we're connected to everyone and everything through God, noway directly. Any relationship that bypasses God is going to be rocky sooner or latterly. When a relationship is blessed with the presence of God, there's a broadening of the heart and the person becomes one’s own, a part of the family. In time, our description of “ family ” expands to encompass not only those within our circles but also those who are seen as outlanders — not only other mortal beings but also catcalls and creatures, shops and trees, the nature in its wholeness and summation. No bone is left out. Says the Mahā Upaniṣad( 6. 71- 72) अयं निज परो वा इति गणना लघुचेतसाम् । उदार- चरितानां तु वसुधैव कुटुम्बकम् ॥ Ayaṁ nijaḥ par Udāra- caritānāṁ tu vasudhaiva kuṭumbakam. o vā iti gaṇanā laghu- cetasām, “ This bone is ours, that( other one) isn't ours — this kind of allowing belongs to narrow inclined people. To the large- hearted, the entire macrocosm becomes one family. ” Source:Vedanta society,Wikipedia

 Our experience of connections passes through three distinct phases in the course of a continuance. 
The first phase is when we start erecting connections. occasionally we do it purposely, but more frequently our connections get erected by a force beyond our control. When we're youthful, we like to explore, we want to know further people, we want to broaden our horizon. A kind of network of musketeers is formed, in addition to the family network that we inherit. further people come a part of our circle when we move into a new neighborhood or when we enter the pool and forge new connections. recently, numerous use social media to make a virtual network of “ musketeers ” in order to compound their being circle( or to make up for the lack of any). 

The alternate phase, which generally occurs when we're in our 20s and 30s, is when we start assessing and assessing our connections. It does n’t take long to realize how pervious the network is and how dynamic its composition. Some nonage connections come distant or are lost, other connections that we pick up remain in the network for varying ages and also vanish, but a many endure. We come more apprehensive of what we're looking for in our connections. When we find what we're looking for, it’s bliss; when we do n’t, we're disappointed, occasionally agonized. 

The third phase begins when we're aged and( hopefully) more mature and thoughtful. This is the phase of pruning, questioning and reflecting. With lesser tone- knowledge we know which connections need to be fostered and which need to terminate. We also question the part and extent of some connections and agonize over them. We begin to reflect over what our connections have meant to us and how they've converted us. We discover that a mature relationship isn't hampered by separation created by distance or indeed by death. The person we relate to is no longer only outdoors, but in some strange kind of way has come an inner, subtler, thick presence. That's how we remain connected with indeed those who are no longer with us. 

It isn't frequently honored that spiritual life is primarily a life devoted to discovering the relationship between oneself and God. Swami Vivekananda defined religion as “ the eternal relation between the eternal soul and the eternal God ”( CW 3. 4). Who am I really? Who's God? How are God and me related? The mystery of life is answered when answers to these questions are set up. 

 In the early stages, our connections in the world appear more real, more stable, more reliable than our relationship with God, who's someone we've noway seen, someone who's simply an idea in the head, or stopgap in the heart, or a belief in the mind. An idea of God, or stopgap or belief related to God, is important nonetheless. Anything associated with God is pigmented with God’s power. 

 Deep faith( śraddhā) can help us persist in the hunt for God. When our spiritual practice is powered by chastity, tolerance and perseverance, the reality of God gradationally begins to take shape in the heart. It’s nearly like seeing someone in a thick fog. We do n’t know who it's we're seeing, but we've no doubt that we're seeing someone. In contemplation we're suitable to feel the presence of God but not relatively see God. nonetheless, a kind of relationship is forged with this unseen but deeply felt godly presence. 

 

 This is a advance in spiritual life. We reach the first concrete goalpost when we know that God truly exists. This isn't an intellectual conviction. This isn't simply a feeling. This is the unshakeable mindfulness that comes without riding on generalities and ideas. God the idea, the stopgap, the belief, disappears. God is now someone real, not simply someone propped up by faith. passing in this way the actuality of God is a precursor to knowing God more nearly, further privately( see Kaṭha Upaniṣad,2.3.13). 

God isn't yet visible enough to make a near relationship possible or easy. But we know for certain we ’ll meet God when the fog disappears. The only thing separating us from God is this mysterious fog. We soon realize that the fog isn't outdoors. It wo n’t evaporate on its own. The fog is within us and we've to drive it down with our own sweats. 

No bone differently can or will do this for us. The further we delay our sweats, the thick the fog gets. 


This consummation infuses new energy and lesser urgency in our spiritual practice. After all, time is limited and, if the fog does n’t dissipate before death, we might have to come again to continue the struggle. Having come this far, it would be foolish to throw in the kerchief. It’s like dropping off in the last afar of a heroically run marathon. What keeps us on the path is deep faith in ourselves, in our schoolteacher( practitioner), and in God, who's frequently imaged in the heart in the form of a chosen ideal( iṣṭa- devatā). 

When the fog disappears completely — it will, if we persist with dogged determination — we stand in the presence of God. At that vital moment, relationship is the last thing on our minds. In fact, at that moment, there's no mind, hence no studies. We're speechless. Time stops.( perhaps it noway was, to begin with.) There's just reposing in the light of God — in the light who's God. Those who “ come back ” from that experience have described their understanding of God in manifold ways. No matter how the relationship with God is described, the experience generally ends up with seeing God in everything, as everything and, contemporaneously, beyond everything. Odd, but true. 

 

 We're reminded of the immanence of God described in the 9th and the 10th chapters of the Gītā, and especially in these two verses( 9. 17- 18) 

पिताहमस्य जगतो माता धाता पितामह । 
 
 वेद्यं पवित्रमोङ्कार ऋक् साम यजुरेव च ॥ 
गतिर्भर्ता प्रभु साक्षी निवास शरणं सुहृत् । 
 
 प्रभव प्रलय स्थानं निधानं बीजमव्ययम् ॥ 
Pitāham asya jagato mātā dhātā pitāmahaḥ, 
 
 vedyaṁ pavitram oṁkāra ṛk sāma yajur- eva ca. 
Gatir- bhartā prabhuḥ sākṣī nivāsaḥ śaraṇaṁ suhṛt, 
 
 prabhavaḥ pralayaḥ sthānaṁ nidhānaṁ bījam avyayam. 
“ I'm the Father of this world the Mother, the Sustainer, the forefather, the Purifier, the one thing to be known, Aum, and also the Ṛk, Sāman and Yajus, the thing, the Supporter, the Lord, the Witness, the Abode, the Refuge, the Friend, the Origin, the Dissolution, the Substratum, the Storehouse, the Seed inflexible. ” 
 
 Hence the following prayer( Prapanna Gītā, 23) 
               त्वमेव माता च पिता त्वमेव 
 
              त्वमेव बन्धुश्च सखा त्वमेव । 
               त्वमेव विद्या द्रविणं त्वमेव 
 
               त्वमेव सर्वं मम देवदेव ॥ 
      Tvam eva mātā ca pitā tvam eva 
 
   tvam eva bandhuś- ca sakhā tvam eva, 
     Tvam eva vidyā draviṇaṁ tvam eva 
 
        tvam eva sarvaṁ ma devadeva. 
             “ O Supreme Lord — 
 
  You're my mama , you're my father, 
 You're my relative, you're my friend, 
 
 You're my knowledge, you're my wealth, 
             You're my all in all. ” 
Coming from a heart filled with sincerity and honesty, this important prayer focuses the mind completely on God. Everything additional disappears, all other connections retire into the background. The shining presence of God alone fills the heart. 
 
 Soon enough, however, questions mayarise.However, father, relative, If God is my mama .Our connections are, of course, not false. Whatever meaning they add to our lives comes from the presence of God essential in them. The love we witness in our connections is the love ofGod.However, that's because God is present not only in them but also in the relationship, If our relationship with our parents has been fulfilling and perfecting. So with our connections with our preceptors, our musketeers, and indeed with the “ unanticipated guest ”( atithi), meaning whoever pops into our lives without previous notice. This really means nearly everyone we know, for how frequently have we entered a memo before someone becomes a part of our lives? 
 
 God is present in everyone and in every relationship. The problem is that we aren't suitable to see this. That's why Vedic preceptors instructed their scholars to make trouble to see God in every relationship( Taittirīya Upaniṣad, 1. 11). When we succeed in doing so, there's harmony, peace, joy, and the relationship is a fulfilling experience. What does it mean to see God in every relationship? What exactly are we anticipated to do? The process is simple enough to describe but may need a lot of trouble to do it well. All we need to do is connect with everything and everyone in life through God and flash back this connection all the time. 
We can begin by seeing our connections with a fresh brace of eyes. Everyone we're related to either as a member of the family or as a friend or as whatever, is a gift that God has given us to help us grow and evolve. Some of God’s “ gifts ” may be puzzling. It may not be easy to see everyone as a gift, since some of them surely are people we find delicate to get on, some may be crazy, some indeed scary. numerous others, thankfully, may be a joy to be around. No matter how everyone around us is, there's a lot we can learn indeed from simply looking at them. From some we learn how we should live; from others, how we shouldn't live. Some educate us how to be, other educate us how not to be. All of these people are our preceptors and earn our love and respect. 
 
 We can also, if we wish, learn to see every person we're related to as belonging to God, as someone God has entrusted in our care. When a friend goes on a holiday
 and requests us to take care of their canine or cat, we readily do so if we watch enough for our friend. For a sucker, God isn't only a friend but everything. It makes a big difference if we see the people in our lives as those kept in our care by God. We take care of them and we love them because we love God. Because they belong to God, God can take them down whenever God wants. All we can do is be thankful for the occasion to serve as long as it's possible. To serve them is to serve God. “ Whatever you did for one of the least of these sisters and sisters of mine, you did for me ”( Matthew, 25 40). 
The primary cause of connections that are unfulfilling, frustrating, disappointing, and heartbreaking is our failure in flashing back to see God in others and in our own hearts, our incapability to see everyone in our lives as God’s gift to us or as someone God has entrusted in our care. The struggle is to flash back — and noway forget — that we're connected to everyone and everything through God, noway directly. Any relationship that bypasses God is going to be rocky sooner or latterly. 
 
 When a relationship is blessed with the presence of God, there's a broadening of the heart and the person becomes one’s own, a part of the family. In time, our description of “ family ” expands to encompass not only those within our circles but also those who are seen as outlanders — not only other mortal beings but also catcalls and creatures, shops and trees, the nature in its wholeness and summation. No bone
 is left out. Says the Mahā Upaniṣad( 6. 71- 72) 
अयं निज परो वा इति गणना लघुचेतसाम् । 
 
 उदार- चरितानां तु वसुधैव कुटुम्बकम् ॥ 
                      Ayaṁ nijaḥ par

                                           Udāra- caritānāṁ tu vasudhaiva kuṭumbakam. 

    o vā iti gaṇanā laghu- cetasām, 
 “ This bone
 is ours, that( other one) isn't ours — this kind of allowing belongs to narrow inclined people. To the large- hearted, the entire macrocosm becomes one family. ” 

Source:Vedanta society,Wikipedia 

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